Wanting vs. Needing Music

How often do I listen to music? How loudly do I listen to music? What music am I listening to?

Like many things, the answers to these questions indicate the state of my mental health. However, the question of whether I am listening to music because I want to or because I feel I need to is probably the strongest indicator.

To me, wanting to listen to music means getting excited and dancing around my room. It means experiencing the sheer emotion that comes from the various chord progressions or deep fulfilling bass. Wanting to listen to music can also mean wanting to feel the depths of my emotion – embracing the sadness, anger, and frustration. It means acceptance. It means I am here in this moment, feeling what I want and am willing to feel.

Needing to listen to music is different. It means rejection – rejection of my emotions, rejection of the outside world, rejection of any pain or difficulty. It means blocking out everyone and everything until I am completely alone. Needing to listen to music means my ability to cope is waning. It means that something needs to change before everything comes to an abrupt and alarming halt.