My sleep playist included Defeater, Chopin and Billie Holiday. I love the idea of walking but that requires energy. I've known workaholics and alcoholics. I've had the pleasure of watching defibrillators at work. I'm more than slightly messed up. I can't imagine not being messed up. My head is pretty shaved (lockdown doesn't count) and... Continue Reading →
I am really bad at actually feeling how I’m feeling. However, I find that music can really aid that process. Recently, I’ve been trying to make a particular effort to make sure I actually address my mood and the direction it’s going in. Even if it’s just so I’m not surprised when things hit the... Continue Reading →
CN: medication, suicidal thoughts
How often do I listen to music? How loudly do I listen to music? What music am I listening to? Like many things, the answers to these questions indicate the state of my mental health. However, the question of whether I am listening to music because I want to or because I feel I need... Continue Reading →
CW: in-depth discussion of eating disorders (no weights or numbers), suicidal thoughts. There are so many misconceptions around eating disorder so here are some of the things I think you should know!
CN: brief mention of eating disorders and suicidal thoughts The passing of time is such an odd concept, especially when it comes to mental health. Sometimes it can feel like time is going really quickly, sometimes incredibly slowly, sometimes backwards and sometimes a mix of all. I think "jumbled" is the best way to describe... Continue Reading →
A, potentially final, look back at my (unjustified) suspension from university, my views and feelings on it, and its impact on me.
CN: Suicidal thoughts, mentions of self-harm and body image, and many unanswered questions
How am I feeling? This is a question that I ask myself frequently but rarely get an answer to. I know when I’m feeling something, but I often find it really hard to identify what it is, and this can be really frustrating, and sometimes distressing. Usually, I can ignore it, or I can make... Continue Reading →
CN: in depth discussion of poor mental health and suicide. Revisiting my old suicide notes.
Black Mental Me 